Ouran Pickup Lines
by RabidOtakuGirl
Summary: Lets see the host club try to use pick-up lines on Haruhi
1. Chapter 1

**Authors note: Hello! This is my second story and I really appreciate my beta reader, for being such a good beta. I am still trying to update Friends For Life but my computer is slow. But let's let this story begin!**

**Update**

The host club tried something new while the costomers were away, they tried getting Haruhi with all these stupid pick up lines. All failed I think

Hikaru: "If I bit my lip, would you kiss it better?" Hikaru asked putting his finger on his lip.

Kaoru: "Can I take a picture of you, so I can show Santa just what I want for Christmas." Kaoru asked cutley.

Kyoya: "Apart from being sexy, what do you do for a living?" Kyoya said looking down on our **herione.**

Tamaki: "Are you as beautiful on the inside as you are on the outside?" Tamaki asked.

Mori: "Do you know karate? 'Cause your body is really kickin'." Mori said looking down on Haruhi

Honey: "You look so sweet your givin me a toothache." Honey said happily.

Tamaki: "Babe, your beauty makes the morning sun look like the dull glimmer of the moon." he said sexily

Hikaru: "You'd better direct that beauty somewhere else, you'll set the carpet on fire" Hikaru laughed looking down at the carpet of the music room.

Honey: You are like a candy bar: half sweet and half nuts.

Kyoya: "Can I buy you a drink or do you just want the money?" Kyoya asked leaning down on Haruhi.

Kaoru: "When God made you, he was showing off." he said smirking

Mori: "Hey, is it just me, or are we destined to be married?" he said holding Haruhi's hand

Honey: I just had to come talk with you. Sweetness is my weakness.

Tamaki: "If I had a rose for every time I thought of you, I would be walking through my garden forever."

Hikaru: "Can you pull this heart-shaped arrow out of my butt? A damn little kid with wings shot me." Hikaru laughed while Haruhi tried to get the arrow while slapping Cupid.

Kyoya: "If beauty were time, you'd be an eternity." he said not looking up from his notebook (Which I swear is a death note)

Haruhi laughed "That's it the host club has finially lost it."

**MORE COMING SOON**


	2. Chapter 2

Kaoru checked off a thing on his to do list. "I am putting you on top of my to-do list" He said smiling

"I'd better get a library card, because I'm checking you out." Kyoya smiled while his eyes were closed.

"I'm no Fred Flintstone, but I'll still make your bed rock." Hikaru smiled seductively.

"If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together" Mori said smiling faintly.

**How about a few from Renge!**

**(Remember, Renge doesn't know Haruhi is a girl)**

"I'm a Ninja! I burn with Demonic passion for you!" Renge shouting, squealing in the process.

"Do you have a quarter? I told my ex boyfriend that I would call him when I found someone better" She smiled holding out her hand for a quarter.

"Haven't we met before? Oh right, in my dreams" She said sighing happily.

**Ok, Lets be normal now**

Honey: "Marry me or make me cookies!" he shouted while holding up a small cookie

Tamaki: "So, how was heaven when you left?" he asked. He looked serious.

Kaoru: "Do you have a quarter I can borrow? (No) Oh, I needed to call God and tell him one of his angels are missing." he said expressionless. Hikaru burst out laughing.

Tamaki: "Do you have French in you? (No) Want some!" he asked eagerly.

Kyoya: "It's gotta be a crime to look that good." he said smirking.

Honey: "All the sugar, and honey in the world couldn't match the sweetness of your voice" he said, while his eyes glazed over for some reason.

Tamaki: "I lost my teddy bear. Would you sleep with me?" he asked giving Haruhi his famous puppy eyes.

Mori: "If I told you that you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?" he asked face absolutely expressionless.

Kaoru: "Did it hurt? (Haruhi; What?) When you fell from heaven?" he asked smiling.

Hikaru: "I've heard sex is a killer. Want to die happy?" he asked mischievously.

Honey: "I have Skittles in my mouth, wanna taste the rainbow?" he said holding out a pack of skittles.

Mori: "You want me. I can smell it." he said sniffing the air.

Tamaki: "You might as well sleep with me because I'm going to tell everyone we did anyway!" he shouted while blushing.

Kyoya: "Hi there. Inheriting 50 million dollars doesn't mean much when you have a weak heart." he said taking Haruhi's hand.

Hikaru: "Nice pants. Can I test the zipper?" Hikaru asked putting a hand on Haruhi's shoulder.

Haruhi looked at all the members of the host club like they were insane….

"Yeah, uuuuh…. Oooooookay…" She said looking very uncomfortable

End until more pick up lines can be found

**Author's note: Hi! I did not make up any of these pick up lines. I am in a jam. If you review, any pick up lines I don't have and they are good ones, leave them in your reviews or private messages. My other story friends for life is sorta in a jam so I can't update for a while. Not too long though. Please PLEASE Review!**

**RabidOtakuGirl**


	3. Chapter 3

_All through the next day, after the customers left. The host club tried this again…_

"_I was so enchanted by your beauty that I ran into that wall over there. So I am going to need your name and number for insurance purposes." Kyoya smiled… "The hosts clubs shadow king." thought Haruhi._

"_Are your parents retarded? 'Cause you sure are special." Hikaru asked, earning a punch from her cross dressing dad as he entered the host club for some reason._

"_Excuse me...Hi, I'm writing a term paper on the finer things in life, and I was wondering if I could interview you…" Kaoru said, holding up a note book and a pencil._

"_You must be a Snickers, cause you satisfy me" Honey said, looking up from his cake._

"_You are so beautiful, that you made me forget my pick up line" Tamaki said laughing at himself._

"_You know, we have actually met before. Remember the dream you had of the perfect guy? I was the guy standing to his right." Hikaru said pointing to Tamaki._

"_You must be a hell of a thief because you stole my heart from across the room." Kyoya said, looking up from his laptop._

"_Wouldn't we look cute on a wedding cake together?" Kaoru asked, looking at all the cake Honey was eating._

"_What do you say we go back to my room and do some math: Add a bed, subtract our clothes, divide your legs, and multiply?" Hikaru asked, earning a hard chase from Tamaki._

"_I just wanted to show this rose how incredibly beautiful you are!" Tamaki said, holding out a rose._

"_You look cold. Want to use me as a blanket?" Kaoru asked as Haruhi shivered on the couch._

"_Is your name daisy? Because I have a sudden urge to plant you right here! " Mori said. Everyone stopped and stared._

_Haruhi looked at the Host club, which they were all bundled together. "I am going home! Tell me when you guys are normal again!" She frowned and left._

"_WTF!" The host club said altogether, including Mori!_

_**END**_

_**Hello! I finially updated. Hooray!**_

_**Wanted to let you know, I have track meets and chorus concerts and stuff, so again a while before the next chapter. Please review!**_

_**Rabid**_


	4. Well

IM SORRY!

But, due to my parental units, I am no longer able to update… Once I get my freedom back.. I will update but for now, hiatus, is my best friend for this story.. I am so so sorry but, when life gives you lemons.. THROW THEM BACK AND DEMAND LEMON SCENES! There are thousands of stories better than this one so read them or make your own for now…

Asta la pasta!

-Rabid


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